Annoying Vacation Photos

I know it’s a little thing. Hardly registers on my own problem-meter. It’s not a problem at all, really, but it’s Monday morning and I’m already pissed off because the company I hired to clean up my property, to weed, cut and trim, was an hour late and instead of a crew of three to work for several hours, there was one dazed dude who said his partners called in sick and he’d do as much as he could.

I have pushed everything back, no shopping, no hiking, no social interaction. I’m staying home to help with the yard, to be here, to assist and write checks and keep him out of the medicine cabinet. So, I’m a little ticked at people who don’t show up and cost me my time. I should know better, right? I’ve been down this road before: workers who don’t return calls, don’t show up, who leave early, who disappear after an hour or so.

While waiting, to kill some time, to calm myself, relax, I boot up Facebook, waste a few minutes, wade into the stream of other people’s lives; where they are and what they are doing.

Yes, yes, of course, dogs and Rumi quotations and videos and pix of parties and kids and gardens and restaurants and cartoons and scoldy posts from vegetarians and anti-Monsantos, threats from religious nuts and narcissists. All cool; totally expected.

Also, vacation pix. Ah. Yes. Just what I need. A little wandering porn, something to distract; a landscape to aid in chilling out while frustrated and fantasizing about travel.

So I have ask: What the fuck is the deal with people posting photos of pretty places and not identifying the location of said photo? Keeping it a secret?

"Here's a picture of a beautiful mountain, lake, beach, but you will never know where it is because I won't tell you. I took the time to post it, but I'm not saying where I am. I want you to see it, to be sucked in and jealous of my good fortune and you can screw yourself if you want to know where this is. Hah. Loser."

Are they so goddamn out of touch, self-centered and narrowly focused? Post a shot of a mountain meadow and not give the locale? Consciously frustrating their followers?

I’m interested in the world and people and beauty, culture, art, nature. Why would someone withhold this info? All of my friends are not assholes. College educated professionals, sane, sober and healthy individuals who have spent hours online making arrangements for the currently displayed holiday, but they don’t have the common courtesy to ID the region where they took the picture?

Unhunh. I scan the top of the screen. Nope. Whereabouts unknown. If I really care, if the environment portrayed is spectacular, I scroll through the comments.

“Where are you?”

“Lovely, where was this taken?”

“Is this Hawaii or West Virginia?”

How hard is it to write the name of a place? I mean, you took the picture, you spent time in your hotel room uploading it, you may have even misspelled a remark or two; how about a few seconds out of your busy schedule to indicate that you’re in Tulum or Thailand? Mediterranean or Caribbean? Northern or Southern fucking hemisphere?

 “Here’s the most incredible coastline on earth. Amazing resort. Enjoying this fab beach. Look how clear the water is. Wow, no people around, miles of sand, lots of cheap food, perfect weather. LOL.”

LOL? Bite me, LOL. Where the hell are you Mr. and Ms. Big Secret? Jesus Christ, you don’t have to tell me what room you’re in, what airline you used or your plans for next week. I don’t care about your life, but if you’ve decided I need to see what you are experiencing and you put up a photo of somewhere that looks alluring, could you please narrow it down to state or country?

While I wait on the landscaping dimwits, trapped in my own home by the ineptitude of the modern world, squandering another day or possibly the rest of the week, just take five seconds tell me if you’re in Slovenia or snorkeling off the coast of Belize.

Seriously, like I said, it’s not a big deal. Less than “one” on the scale of irritants.

Have a nice trip, enjoy the beach or mountains or wherever the hell you are this summer while I listen to the sound of a weed-whacker.